after disc golf

after a day of disc golf with coulter 
i hurt and my joy banks     overstable
the body is worn and i     well     i’ve grown older
this sun won’t shine     a week of storm     it’s the way of mud
to try various stretches     feel every whip
of the wrist in the valley under the blade of my shoulder 

i lie back     let myself twitch     let the chi run
you may not believe it     i invented chi
with the help of the books i’ve read     people i’ve known
the forms i’ve practiced     and all the ones i don’t
collectively i mean     we created chi
in me      we teach the daily art of detection

post twitch     a gate opens      my sinews buzz
with a lightness a     dance of lit-up nerve endings
magic     imagination      none of the above
they aren’t kidding when they call it subtle
this energy this     effervescent drone
along my limbs and      down my spine it goes

chi emerges from a social discovery
as do i     as do we all emerge in me
and all in you     according to the way
we     with your help      construct ourselves in you
in daily diligence we do     become
by one another’s willing agency

this co-creation’s not a one and done
like christ i say     you don’t get to my daddy
but by me     i don’t get to anyone
unless they open the door to a story
and teach me how to make a new society
of a kind that doesn’t come undone so soon

a loose association of subtleties
that twitch open and flow as through a door
all willowy like a river or the thread
that runs through a story and binds it whole
to the lazy thoughts that bubble about my head
erupt ex nihilis     ex omnibus

all we ever made together     out of words
out of the quiet of mutual respect
out of smiling and     understanding questions
out of gestures out of a gentle     acceptance
that our worlds are built by different hands
using different standards of measurement

the shape i take in you     that’s who i am
when this one’s gone     and i am self-serving
enough to want a budding afterlife
neither buddha nor the christ occludes my view
only a sapling that changes the way
i fling myself toward the great i am